It Has Begun

Spring cleaning that is!!! Shaking off the dust, packing winter away and welcoming spring. Now if I could only breathe it in without sneezing!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET LUCY!!!

5 years ago today our sweet sweet Lucy entered the world. We are so very blessed. We love you little one and we are so glad God chose us to be your family.

Living God's Way - Part 1

A few weeks ago in church, during the prayers of the people, I heard something I have not been able to get out of my head. The priest saying the prayers prayed the following: “Forgive us for our failure to act like Your (God) holy people and grant us the courage to be different.” I have been thinking so much about those two statements and my mind has been left spinning on more than one occasion as I contemplate the implications of what they could really mean. Even now my mind is racing with the thoughts I want to share. My fingers cannot move fast enough…I fear I won’t get it all out.

It’s true, in modern day America, we Christians fail miserably at living as people belonging to the one true God…holy and set apart by Him for a special purpose. What purpose is that? Going out into the world and making disciples of all nations – exactly what Jesus commanded us before He went back to be with the Father. It’s become a game almost of trying to figure out the “right” way to tell people about Jesus. We have biker ministry, sports ministry, urban ministry, suburban, ministry, working women’s ministry, stay at home mom ministry, and the list goes on and on and on. We are broken down into tiny groups that seem to fit our needs. But when did Christianity become about fitting into our needs? How is the gospel message any different for any of those groups? We fret and fear that if we don’t have a way to relate to a certain group of people we won’t possibly be able to reach them. Well news flash, WE aren’t doing the reaching. WE aren’t doing the saving. WE aren’t doing much of anything as long as we are convinced that there needs to be a certain atmosphere or music or style in order to get the message of Christ died and risen across to people.

I’m guilty of this in so many ways and I am really trying to figure out how to make sense of it all. I do think there are better and worse ways to reach people – but does that take power away from God and give it to the lighting in our youth room? I tend to cast judgment on the in your face, handing out tracts, street corner type of ministry. I don’t think that is they best way to reach people. But lately I wonder if I am too concerned with making people feel comfortable…about making their experience of God so comfortable that life WITH God hardly seems different that life WITHOUT God. I shake my head as I consider all of the mile wide and inch deep Christians I know and yet, as part of the establishment that has helped create them, I feel a keen sense of responsibility. In many ways I think the blame for the failure to live as God’s holy people rests squarely on the shoulders of the church. We can boo-hoo all we want to about society and how devoid of God it is. We can cry rivers about the influence the media and entertainment industry has on society. We can wring our hands over the push towards self-reliance in our world and the quest for peace that turns to all kinds of remedies that don’t stand a chance of working. But until we realize that there is nothing new under the sun we don’t stand a chance of turning the tide. God has seen it all before, we aren’t so much worse off then some of the cultures in the time of Jesus.

So what now? In many ways I have no freaking idea. The thoughts to follow are a rough first draft – born out of thought and prayer and a heart that is really trying to discern what God is saying.

Jesus spent the majority of his life out of public ministry. I wonder so much about those first 30 years. I wonder about the ways God was prepping him for the work that lay ahead…I wish we knew more about it. One thing I am sure of is that it had to involve a lot of prayer and fellowship with the Father. In our drive thru, photos in an hour, pizza there in 30 minutes or less world it is hard to imagine a life dedicated to prayer. It is hard for us to plan time in our day for prayer that lasts longer than a few moments. Many days I fall into bed thinking, “well at least I prayed before all of my meals”. How pathetic is that? My life is full and it is busy but that is NO excuse. It is my responsibility as a child of God to build in time for prayer. How can I possibly know the Father without it? I can I even hope to live as one of His holy people if I am not in fellowship with Him. (and fellowship that is deeper than “hey, thanks for the chicken”) So number one on my list of how to live as God’s holy people is prayer. Prayer that changes us. Prayer that allows God to reach into our lives and speak His truth. I don’t begin to know what that looks like, but if we ask I’m sure God will show us.


While I think most of the other ways to live a holy and different life will spring from time spent in prayer I do think that there are a couple of other things that are clear from scripture. We need to care for the people that are close to the heart of God. The people Jesus mentions more than any other in the Gospels are the poor…and it cannot be by accident. The poor in this country (we’ll leave the rest of the world out of it for now…that will come later) need us. They don’t need the government they need the church. They need us to take seriously the words of Jesus and move into action. I just don’t see how it is negotiable for Christians. And writing a check isn’t enough, as I’ve said before…throwing money at the poor isn’t the way to solve the problem.

We also need to cut off our love affair with stuff. Stuff love is a death sentence spiritually speaking. I’m as guilty as anyone else when it comes to this. Sometimes stuff brings me comfort and helps me feel better – but I don’t want that false sense of comfort anymore. I listen to people talking about getting a better computer when the one they have is more than sufficient…getting a more powerful iPod or cell phone or PDA when the ones they have are just fine. I watch the way I desire stuff not only for myself but also for my children and then I am ashamed of the example I am setting for them. I can rationalize it saying that it isn’t for me…but it is. We have to stop. We don’t need newer, better and more. Our closets are bulging, our world is overloaded with garbage, and our souls are suffering a slow death…one that is barely noticeable until we are really bad off. It isn’t worth it – you know it and I know it.

Okay, that is enough for now. My mind isn’t spinning quite so fast anymore. I seek your thoughts on all of this…I welcome them regardless of where you fall down on these issues. Peace.

What a Difference a Week Makes

It was one week ago that Jack got sick. He is almost all the way better today and seeming more and more like himself. So now I just need to fatten him up a bit (he probably lost 3 or 4 pounds throughout the ordeal) and we should be all set.

I have spent a lot of time thinking this week...at first becasue I was sitting in the hospital and then because we stuck close to home and kept life very low key to aid in recovery...thinking about life and death and how we have so little control over any of it. It is amazing to me how a child (or anyone really) can seem so healthy and strong one hour and the next be so fragile and sick. When Jack first got sick something in my gut (aka. mother's intuition) told me that he was really sick. Because I am a worrier by nature I tried not to say anything...my worry has become somewhat of a legend in my family...but finally at 3 in the morning I just blurted out "I think something is really wrong". I called the Pediatrician and we were sent to the ER. Jack got 900ml of fluids (which is a HECK of a lot for a kid his size) and even with that he never wet his diaper or perked up. I must have asked about that 5 times before we left and was assured he would be fine. WRONG. I knew he was still sick...I knew in my gut we would end up back there, but I knew he was well enough to go home for the night. I knew we had a doctor's appt the next morning...and I trust my pediatrician implicitly.

Because I worry and because that worry has negatively impacted my life throughout the years, I have learned to not listen to myself. What an awful thing. My gut feelings are very rarely wrong...and I have to listen to them more than I do because I believe that is how God chooses to speak to me. I'm going to start listening because God is reliable and can be counted on.


So no, we cannot control much of what happens in this life but if we can learn to listen for God - in the ways He speaks to us - we can find peace and hopefully leave the worry behind.

Birthday Photos!!!

Here are three great photos from Jack's birthday!!!

Happy Birthday A Little Late

I know some of you who follow the events of our family may be wondering if I lost it completely by not posting on Jack's third birthday. No not at all.

At his party on the 10th, Jack began throwing up. (a funny note...a soon as he threw up for the first time Annie, the ever loving big sister, said "well this is the worst party ever"!!!) The throwing up (and other things...yuck) continued for hours and hours and he began to throw up dried blood. So to the ER we went where he was given fluids and we were sent packing (before I felt comfortable). Monday we went to our Pediatrician who was dismayed that we were sent home with such a sick little boy. So back to the ER we go!!! This time Jack was admitted to Children's Hospital whrere he remained for 24 hours. We are home now and all got a good night's sleep last night. Jack, while not 100%, is much better and we hope for a continual (yet gradual) upswing for him!!!

Believe it or not we did get some great birthday pictures before the puking started so I will post them another time. We are so grateful to everyone who offered us support these past few days...many without even being asked. Especially for Grandma who kept Annie and Lucy while we were tied up. But for dinners, surprise visits to the Hospital, meals here at home, and the plethora of phone calls and prayers, we are truly thankful. We are blessed to have such a rich source of love and friendship in our lives.

As always we are most thankful to God, our healer and protector, for His amazing love and all sufficient grace. Amen.