Alternative Holidays

Alex and I have been doing some talking lately about how, as our kids grow up we want to impart some different values about Christmas to them. Thankfully, we are living in a time where lots of resources exist to help us out. I thought I'd share some of them with you.

For a different take on Advent, check out Advent Conspiracy. It's chock full of ideas for how to spend the time leading up to Christmas focusing on the gift of Jesus rather than material gifts. It's is definitely suited for older kids but can still offer good ideas for families with younger ones.

For some alternative Christmas gifts, head on over to one of the following:

The Heifer Project

World Vision

Trees For Life

Church World Service

Changing The Present

Well that should get us started! It can be hard to turn the tide, I know that all too well. But it is a worthy endeavor and one that I believe honors the birth of Christ in a very authentic way.

Peace friends.

Alex and Beth version 4.0

We are thrilled to share with you that we are expecting another addition to our family in mid April. We have known for a few weeks but have been enjoying keeping the secret a little longer than we normally would. But now the kids now so it's out of the bag. We have gotten over the initial shock - and yes it was a shock - and now we are over the moon with happiness. So far things are going really well but we covet your prayers for this littlest one among us and for the rest of us as we prepare for this amazing blessing. Another little baby...*big happy sigh*. Here is a little glimpse into what is happening with our tiny wonder...

How your baby's growing:
Your baby still appears to have a small tail (actually, it's an extension of his tailbone), which will disappear in the next few weeks. But that's the only thing getting smaller. Now almost half an inch long — roughly the size of a raspberry — he has elbow joints and distinct, slightly webbed fingers and toes. In his over sized head, both hemispheres of his brain are developing. His teeth and the inside of his mouth are forming, and his ears continue to develop. Eyelid folds partially cover his tiny peepers, which already have some color, and the tip of that nose you'll be tweaking someday is emerging. His skin is paper-thin and his veins are clearly visible.

Your little one also has an appendix and a pancreas, which will eventually produce the hormone insulin to aid in digestion. His liver is busy producing red blood cells, and a loop of your baby's growing intestines is bulging into his umbilical cord, which now has distinct blood vessels to carry oxygen and nutrients to and from his tiny body. You can't feel his gyrations yet, but your baby is like a little jumping bean, moving in fits and starts around his watery home.

What I learned on My Summer Vacation

Whew! It is hard to believe that this time last week my mom, the kids and I were driving through Washington DC trying to catch a glimpse of the White House. Post 9-11, you cannot get near the place in a car and the kids are a little too young for the complete walking tour. But we caught the most popular view from Constitution Avenue and Annie was satisfied. We also say the Capitol and the Washington Monumnet. I'm so lucky that I grew up there and got to see all of those things and all of the great museums as a kid.

We had a wonderful trip. We visited with old friends in Bethesda, MD and then with family in Fredricksburg and Williamsburg, VA. All in all it was a good time and fun was had by all. I thought I would share with you some lessons I learned on the journey.

1. The south is HOT...sweltering...sticky...inhumane...and I am a wussy northener. I couldn't believe how hot it was. When it is 103 with 95% humidity...I'm calling it a day. Give me some AC or a cool pool and it's all good but other than that I'm melting and so are my kids. No sir, I was not created for that kind of heat.

2. The beginnings of our country were both heroic and tragic. We had a chance to visit both Colonial Williamsburg and the Jamestown Settlement and we all loved it. It was so wonderful for the kids and me to see so much about how people lived back in those days...it was a simpler time without many of the things that distract us today (you know blogs and whatnot). The Jamestown settlers came over to this country as a business venture...not seeking freedom of any sort. They made a heroic journey under troubling conditions and really helped to form the basis for our government and rule of law. Unfortunately, in the process they also disenfranchised the native Americans and introduced slavery...two of the most tragic outcomes possible from their arrival.

3. Parenting styles are as unique as the individual. I spent time with several different mamas on my trip and each of them are wonderful and very different. Some are high strung, some are laid back...some are controllers, some are go with the flow types...some are into a lot of structure and some aren't. It's hard when your kids are used to one style of life...and you throw them into another one. And I think it is harder if, like my kids, they are used to a more free and laid back lifestyle and they enter into a more structured one. My kids did alright, I think...and I know it is crucial for them to be exposed to all different kinds of life.

4. There is a security in family that is unmatched. We visited with my cousin Norman and his awesome wife Carolyn. Carolyn and I were pregnant together (I with my first and she with her last) and we have been close ever since. Norman is in the military and they have lived all over the world...but now they are back in the states and we have gotten to see them for extended periods the last 2 summers. It felt like an extended version of home being with them...it was easy to talk and just hang out and be myself. Though she and I are very different - I wasn't worried about the differences becasue I love her and I knew that I would be welcomed and accepted.

5. Single parents are amazing. Now technically I wasn't really single parenting becasue there were always others around to lend a hand. But all of the care for the three kiddos was on me and it was tiring and draining emotionally. I cannot imagine living that life full time and not having anyone around to help out.

6. My kids are awesome. They behaved so well (for the most part) and got along well with all of the other kids they encountered. The girls were really interested in Jamestown and loved the tour my aunt gave them (she works there) - even though it was a million degrees...did I mention the heat? :) I had so much fun being with them and we laughed a lot!

7. I missed my man like MAD! Alex goes away for a few weeks each year but usually for shorter durations. This was the longest I have been away from him in 6 years and I really missed him. Because of time differences and his schedule we really didn't get to talk for any good length of time. We touched base several times a day but never had a conversation that amounted to more than the basics. I am aching for him to be home (he should be here in about an hour!!!) and in my arms again.

8. God is good. I had a lot of anxiety about this trip. I wanted everyone to be safe and happy. I thrive on my routine and I knew that would be interrupted completely on this trip. But God is faithful and unchanging and He walked with me each step of the way.

It's always so good to come home and be able to look back on a time away with a smile and good memories. I'm grateful for what an amazing opportunity this trip was...and I'm glad to be home again.

Forgiveness...Reconciliation...Repentance...etc

*Big sigh*

These topics are heavy on my heart right now for a lot of reasons. I cannot imagine the joy we would always find in relationships if sin didn't exist. I long for that joy in some relationships in my life that are broken. But I don't have hope for some of them. Am I wrong in that?

What is necessary for forgiveness? An apology? Some proof that things have changed? Enough time passed for the hurt to heal? Or is it just a willing heart that is led by God to forgive? I just don't know. Of course I do believe that God can enable us to forgive when we could not do it alone but I have been wondering lately if forgiveness and reconciliation always go hand in hand.

Is there wisdom in reconciling a relationship that has been detrimental to you? Should we re-enter a relationship that has been abusive - emotionally, verbally, physically etc. - if there seems to be an earnest change in the abuser? I have to say that I don't think so.

I don't think that forgiveness automatically leads to reconciliation... and I don't think it necessarily should. Forgiveness is important, whether or not it is asked for. Forgiveness is a letting go of the anger, resentment, and bitterness that destroys us, that keeps us from God. Forgiveness is so freaking hard - and I'm not very good at it. Reconciliation is even harder...because it is hard to know which relationship should be reconciled.

My heart is hurting right now and I would love to hear some of your responses to all of this.

Tragedy at Virgina Tech

I don't know anyone (as of yet) who is connected in any way to the tragic situation at Virgina tech and yet I am still profoundly saddened by it. I have thought about it from two different perspectives in the past 24 hours...from the student's perspective - the fear and confusion that must have flooded over them as they heard shots ring out and saw their friends and teachers shot and killed...and from the perspective of the parents whose children attend VT - the horror that must have gone through their minds to realize that their babies were in danger and many of them were hundreds of miles away.

My heart aches and feel heavy within my chest - words of sorrow and comfort come to my lips but seem somehow trite and empty. 32 people are dead and 15 others are injured - and the lives of 26,000 students plus faculty, staff, and families will never be the same. In the span of a few hours, one person impacted so many others with evil and hatred.

What is there to say or do in the face of such evil and hatred? Not a lot. Now is a time for healing, a time for loving, a time for consolation. Now is a time to turn to the only one who can bear this kind of burden, because we surely cannot.

Join me in prayer for all those impacted by this horrible tragedy. Pray for healing and comfort. Pray for those who represent the one true God - Jesus Christ - on the campus...that they will be agents of peace and love. Pray for those who are left with questions too big for any human to answer.

Lord, in Your goodness, have mercy.

Happy Easter

Jesus Christ Is Risen Today

Jesus Christ is risen today, Alleluia!
Our triumphant holy day, Alleluia!
Who did once, upon the cross, Alleluia!
Suffer to redeem our loss, Alleluia!

Hymns of praise then let us sing, Alleluia!
Unto Christ, our heavenly King, Alleluia!
Who endured the cross and grave, Alleluia!
Sinners to redeem and save, Alleluia!

But the pains which He endured, Alleluia!
Our salvation hath procured, Alleluia!
Now above the sky He’s king, Alleluia!
Where the angels ever sing, Alleluia!

Sing we to our God above, Alleluia!
Praise eternal as His love, Alleluia!
Praise Him, all you heavenly host, Alleluia!
Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, Alleluia!

Good Friday

When I Survey The Wondrous Cross

When I survey the wondrous cross
On which the Prince of glory died,
My richest gain I count but loss,
And pour contempt on all my pride.

Forbid it, Lord, that I should boast,
Save in the death of Christ my God!
All the vain things that charm me most,
I sacrifice them to His blood.

See from His head, His hands, His feet,
Sorrow and love flow mingled down!
Did e’er such love and sorrow meet,
Or thorns compose so rich a crown?

Were the whole realm of nature mine,
That were a present far too small;
Love so amazing, so divine,
Demands my soul, my life, my all.

Living God's Way - Part 2

Have you ever had a week that started out so well and ended in the crapper? A week where though you had high hopes at the beginning you knew it wasn't going to turn out well at all? I have.

But none of my good to bad weeks can compare with the week Jesus had all those years ago...when he began the week entering Jerusalem triumphantly, people bowing to him and treating him like royalty...and ended the week in the grave, paying the price for our sins. Now that is a week that just sucks.

Today is Maundy Thursday the day when we remember Christ's last meal, his last time hanging out with His friends (and enemy), his last moments to teach the men who would carry His message into the world. I feel for the disciples - they had no clue what was about to happen to their lives. Knowing Jesus truly wrecked their lives forever - and I mean that in good and bad ways.

Has knowing Jesus wrecked your life? I ask myself that question often - sort of as a way to measure my levels of being in or of the world. I know we are called to be in the world and not of the world...but sometimes those lines get very blurry to me. I didn't begin a transformational relationship with Jesus until I was 16 and I spent all the years before that being of the world. I allowed the world to shape my views and thoughts and actions. And that is a mighty huge tide to turn. I know God is big and amazing and all of that but so is the power of self and society. It has been a fierce battle sometimes for my allegiance and attention. I so badly want to give it all to God but then there are these voices and vices and they call to me. (not in an audible, I hear voices sort of way)

There are things that I long for that aren't of God...sometimes more than I long for the things that are of God. I mean I want to be wise and compassionate and patient but sometimes I want more to be right and powerful and adored. It's a struggle like none I've ever known - the struggle to constantly die to myself and live for God.

Tonight I will sit in church after partaking in the Eucharist and I will listen and watch as psalms are read and the altar is stripped in preparation for Good Friday. I will remember the accounts of what Jesus did on this night - how he took his closest friends with him to a garden and asked them to keep watch and pray for Him. How he prayed to God that there be some other way to accomplish the goal other than the brutal torture and death he was about to endure. How He came out to find his friends asleep - and how very alone that must have felt. I will sit there as the church grows darker and darker and realize that for a moment the powers of that darkness thought they might win. I will meditate upon the feelings that must have coursed through the fully divine and fully human Jesus - feelings of fear, anger, loneliness and pain. I will ask God to, once again, break my heart with the power of His love - the very love that sent Jesus to Calvary - the very love that has the power to change the world - the very love that has wrecked my life.

Living God's Way - Part 1

A few weeks ago in church, during the prayers of the people, I heard something I have not been able to get out of my head. The priest saying the prayers prayed the following: “Forgive us for our failure to act like Your (God) holy people and grant us the courage to be different.” I have been thinking so much about those two statements and my mind has been left spinning on more than one occasion as I contemplate the implications of what they could really mean. Even now my mind is racing with the thoughts I want to share. My fingers cannot move fast enough…I fear I won’t get it all out.

It’s true, in modern day America, we Christians fail miserably at living as people belonging to the one true God…holy and set apart by Him for a special purpose. What purpose is that? Going out into the world and making disciples of all nations – exactly what Jesus commanded us before He went back to be with the Father. It’s become a game almost of trying to figure out the “right” way to tell people about Jesus. We have biker ministry, sports ministry, urban ministry, suburban, ministry, working women’s ministry, stay at home mom ministry, and the list goes on and on and on. We are broken down into tiny groups that seem to fit our needs. But when did Christianity become about fitting into our needs? How is the gospel message any different for any of those groups? We fret and fear that if we don’t have a way to relate to a certain group of people we won’t possibly be able to reach them. Well news flash, WE aren’t doing the reaching. WE aren’t doing the saving. WE aren’t doing much of anything as long as we are convinced that there needs to be a certain atmosphere or music or style in order to get the message of Christ died and risen across to people.

I’m guilty of this in so many ways and I am really trying to figure out how to make sense of it all. I do think there are better and worse ways to reach people – but does that take power away from God and give it to the lighting in our youth room? I tend to cast judgment on the in your face, handing out tracts, street corner type of ministry. I don’t think that is they best way to reach people. But lately I wonder if I am too concerned with making people feel comfortable…about making their experience of God so comfortable that life WITH God hardly seems different that life WITHOUT God. I shake my head as I consider all of the mile wide and inch deep Christians I know and yet, as part of the establishment that has helped create them, I feel a keen sense of responsibility. In many ways I think the blame for the failure to live as God’s holy people rests squarely on the shoulders of the church. We can boo-hoo all we want to about society and how devoid of God it is. We can cry rivers about the influence the media and entertainment industry has on society. We can wring our hands over the push towards self-reliance in our world and the quest for peace that turns to all kinds of remedies that don’t stand a chance of working. But until we realize that there is nothing new under the sun we don’t stand a chance of turning the tide. God has seen it all before, we aren’t so much worse off then some of the cultures in the time of Jesus.

So what now? In many ways I have no freaking idea. The thoughts to follow are a rough first draft – born out of thought and prayer and a heart that is really trying to discern what God is saying.

Jesus spent the majority of his life out of public ministry. I wonder so much about those first 30 years. I wonder about the ways God was prepping him for the work that lay ahead…I wish we knew more about it. One thing I am sure of is that it had to involve a lot of prayer and fellowship with the Father. In our drive thru, photos in an hour, pizza there in 30 minutes or less world it is hard to imagine a life dedicated to prayer. It is hard for us to plan time in our day for prayer that lasts longer than a few moments. Many days I fall into bed thinking, “well at least I prayed before all of my meals”. How pathetic is that? My life is full and it is busy but that is NO excuse. It is my responsibility as a child of God to build in time for prayer. How can I possibly know the Father without it? I can I even hope to live as one of His holy people if I am not in fellowship with Him. (and fellowship that is deeper than “hey, thanks for the chicken”) So number one on my list of how to live as God’s holy people is prayer. Prayer that changes us. Prayer that allows God to reach into our lives and speak His truth. I don’t begin to know what that looks like, but if we ask I’m sure God will show us.


While I think most of the other ways to live a holy and different life will spring from time spent in prayer I do think that there are a couple of other things that are clear from scripture. We need to care for the people that are close to the heart of God. The people Jesus mentions more than any other in the Gospels are the poor…and it cannot be by accident. The poor in this country (we’ll leave the rest of the world out of it for now…that will come later) need us. They don’t need the government they need the church. They need us to take seriously the words of Jesus and move into action. I just don’t see how it is negotiable for Christians. And writing a check isn’t enough, as I’ve said before…throwing money at the poor isn’t the way to solve the problem.

We also need to cut off our love affair with stuff. Stuff love is a death sentence spiritually speaking. I’m as guilty as anyone else when it comes to this. Sometimes stuff brings me comfort and helps me feel better – but I don’t want that false sense of comfort anymore. I listen to people talking about getting a better computer when the one they have is more than sufficient…getting a more powerful iPod or cell phone or PDA when the ones they have are just fine. I watch the way I desire stuff not only for myself but also for my children and then I am ashamed of the example I am setting for them. I can rationalize it saying that it isn’t for me…but it is. We have to stop. We don’t need newer, better and more. Our closets are bulging, our world is overloaded with garbage, and our souls are suffering a slow death…one that is barely noticeable until we are really bad off. It isn’t worth it – you know it and I know it.

Okay, that is enough for now. My mind isn’t spinning quite so fast anymore. I seek your thoughts on all of this…I welcome them regardless of where you fall down on these issues. Peace.

What a Difference a Week Makes

It was one week ago that Jack got sick. He is almost all the way better today and seeming more and more like himself. So now I just need to fatten him up a bit (he probably lost 3 or 4 pounds throughout the ordeal) and we should be all set.

I have spent a lot of time thinking this week...at first becasue I was sitting in the hospital and then because we stuck close to home and kept life very low key to aid in recovery...thinking about life and death and how we have so little control over any of it. It is amazing to me how a child (or anyone really) can seem so healthy and strong one hour and the next be so fragile and sick. When Jack first got sick something in my gut (aka. mother's intuition) told me that he was really sick. Because I am a worrier by nature I tried not to say anything...my worry has become somewhat of a legend in my family...but finally at 3 in the morning I just blurted out "I think something is really wrong". I called the Pediatrician and we were sent to the ER. Jack got 900ml of fluids (which is a HECK of a lot for a kid his size) and even with that he never wet his diaper or perked up. I must have asked about that 5 times before we left and was assured he would be fine. WRONG. I knew he was still sick...I knew in my gut we would end up back there, but I knew he was well enough to go home for the night. I knew we had a doctor's appt the next morning...and I trust my pediatrician implicitly.

Because I worry and because that worry has negatively impacted my life throughout the years, I have learned to not listen to myself. What an awful thing. My gut feelings are very rarely wrong...and I have to listen to them more than I do because I believe that is how God chooses to speak to me. I'm going to start listening because God is reliable and can be counted on.


So no, we cannot control much of what happens in this life but if we can learn to listen for God - in the ways He speaks to us - we can find peace and hopefully leave the worry behind.

Ash Wednesday

Today is Ash Wednesday, which marks the beginning of Lent. Lent is the 40 day period before Easter in Western Christianity. It is a solemn season in the church, a time to reflect and have our hearts softened by God in preparation for the celebration of the death and resurrection of Jesus. When I was growing up in the Roman Catholic Church the focus in Lent was sacrifice. We were encouraged to "give something up" for Lent. I remember giving up chewing gum in seventh grade, cursing in high school etc. The point was to sacrifice something to God in the hopes that it would bring you closer to Him. I don't know if it ever did that but I like the concept.

About 10 years ago I was working someplace where my commute was approximately 30 minutes each way. I enjoyed listening to my stereo on the drive there and back. That year for Lent I gave up listening to music in the car. Though I had left the RCC the idea of giving something up for Lent never left me. I was determined to use that 60 minutes a day to pray in an attempt to renew my relationship to God. I did pray...everyday I made that commute and I did notice a change in my relationship to God. It seemed to deepen and strengthen and I liked that.

Well Easter came and went the radio went back on in the car. I actually never even considered keeping my Lenten discipline up after Easter. But then one day about a week after Easter I went put to my car to discover that the stereo had been stolen! Replacing it was not a financial priority at the time so I went without. I didn't start praying right away again and I don't think God "took" my radio...but eventually when I did start praying on my commute again I was able to embrace the missing radio as a pathway to God.

Tonight we will go to church for the Ash Wednesday Service where we will have ashes (made from the palms from last year's Palm Sunday Service) placed on our foreheads in the shape of a cross. This is a symbol of repentance before God and it is an outward expression of our faith. There aren't many of those anymore...for me at least...so it is a good reminder.

As I have grown as a Christian I have determined that giving something up for Lent isn't enough. A while back I decided that I also wanted to add something during Lent. This year we are going to read from a Lenten family devotional each night at dinner. I hope this will be a rich experience for our entire family. I haven't fully determined what I am giving up..but I can tell you it won't be Grey's Anatomy or blogging!!!

If you Pray...

Then please pray for Nate...the husband of a friend of mine who was recently diagnosed with Lymphoma. Nate is young...29 I think and he and his wife have a 1 year old daughter. Please pray for Nate's health and that God would be very close to this family in the coming weeks and months as they wage their battle against cancer.

Though prayer confuses me at times, I do believe in it. I believe it changes us more than it changes any particular situation and that it is used to draw us closer to the Father. Please join me in praying for Nate. Thanks and peace be with you.

Winds of Change...literally!

We have been experiencing a wonderful spell of warm weather lately. Since Thanksgiving it has been in the 60's with a lot of sunshine. It has been great to be able to be outside with the kids and let them get some playtime in before the winter sets in. I've also had the windows open some to get fresh air in the house. and I love that.

But today that is all changing. We woke this morning to a temp of 65...so nice! But the clouds are rolling in and the wind is picking up. There is a high wind advisory for today and by tonight the temp is supposed to be in the 20's with snow showers!!! From one extreme to another. Tonight we are going to Light Up Night in our little borough, so I guess it is good that it's cooling down. I do find it hard to get "into" the holiday spirit when it is warm outside. So we'll walk down to a little park here and watch as they light the HUGE evergreen tree and the Santa will make an appearance on a fire truck and hand out candy canes. The kids will love it and then we can walk home and snuggle in from the cold.

Lately some friend sand I have been talking about the whole idea of Santa and whether to tell your kids about him. I'm not talking about this from a Christian perspective (that is an whole other post) but rather from the perspective of what some people consider to be lying to your children. I suppose in a very technical and legalistic sense perpetuating the myth of Santa is lying, but I have never seen it that way. I loved the magic of Santa as a child and I remember so many fun times huddling under the cover with my brothers on Christmas Eve and being SURE we heard the tapping of reindeer hooves on the roof. We tried to be as quiet as we could because everyone knows Santa won't come unless you are asleep! In our family not only did Santa bring presents but he also decorated the tree. So we went to bed on Christmas Eve with an undecorated tree and no gifts and woke up in the morning to a beautifully decorated tree and a room teeming with presents. It was thrilling to run down the stairs to see what Santa had done.

As we each came to know that Santa was really my parents we got to join in on the decorating and enjoy watching the surprise on the faces of the remaining believers! I can remember vividly when my younger brother realized that Santa was my mom and dad...I think I was more upset than anyone! I was sad that this era was over...some of the magic disappeared. But I was never angry at my parents or felt as if I couldn't trust them because of Santa. On the contrary, I appreciated all of the effort they gave so that we could have a magical experience of Christmas. And in the midst of it all we knelt around our Advent wreath every night and prayed, calling to mind the real reason for our celebration. There was balance between love and magic and reverence, it was wonderful.

So while I respect the right of every parent to make the choice regarding Santa that is best for their family I want to say thanks to my mom and dad for the wonder of Santa I experienced as a child. I loved it and hope to pass that magic onto my kids.

Escaping the Holiday Labryinth

With the holidays being jammed down our throats earlier and earlier each year I find myself more and more stressed about getting everything done in order to "enjoy" the season. Cards (which I missed last year), gifts, baking, decorating...it gets to be a bit overwhelming. I start out in the right frame of mind; thinking what gets done, gets done and what doesn't, doesn't. But before long I fall into that familiar trap of being too busy and pushed to enjoy anything I'm doing.

Well, I'm trying to turn over a new leaf this year. I'm trying to look at the holidays as THE gift and trying to escape the maze. Have you ever seen those experiments where they put mice in one end of a maze and cheese at the other? The poor little mouse can smell the cheese but has to figure out how to navigate through the maze to get to it. The helpless creature is constantly banging into walls and retracing its' steps to get it right. All for some lame piece of cheese it is almost too exhausted to eat at the finish line.

I am that mouse. And coming off as the quintessential wife, mom, friend, daughter, sister, aunt, hostess, communicator, gift giver, and cook is the cheese. So I work myself into a frenzy trying to transform my mouse into a super-model and I keep banging my heads against walls and never get to enjoy the real spirit of the season.

The only part of my identity that REALLY matters is that of Beth, the beloved disciple of Jesus Christ...child of the one true God. My worth and comfort have to come from that or else they really don't exist. I can pretty the house up, bake yummy cookies, write the best Christmas letter ever, buy everyone on my list the perfect gift and still miss the mark by a long shot.

On a day in Bethlehem long ago when a baby breathed it's first breath in the cool night air, everything changed. This year, I want to remember that. I want to remember the sacrifice that we celebrate at Christmas. And one of the ways I intend to do that is by giving some Alternative Christmas Gifts . This link will take you to World Vision's gift catalog page where you can be a part of something way bigger that the 10th anniversary of Tickle Me Elmo. You can (for not too much money) buy a share in a well that will bring clean drinking water to an entire village. You can buy a share of cattle that will provide a family with a way to make money. You can provide medication for a child orphaned by AIDS...and on and on.

Please consider doing this for at least one gift on your list this year. The big corporate toy makers won't really miss your money that much and the difference you can make in the lives of people around the world is immeasurable.

Peace.

Embracing the Quiet

As a professional Mama of three active and energetic kids I don't often get to experience quiet. It seems as if there is always some sort of noise in my life. Mostly I love the noise, even the crying and arguing that goes on between the kidlets. I find it comforting to embrace the noise because it keeps me grounded in the now. It is far too easy for me to become nostalgic for the past or anxious about the future; but the noise in my life wakes me up to the reality of the present.

To be frank, quiet can sometimes really intimidate me. It feels so empty and big. But I know that I need quiet...I need it for my soul to be nourished and for my spirit to mature. Maturing the spiritual side often is synonymous with hard times...we seem to grow more through difficulties. I don't get that about human beings and I wish I could find a way to real and deep growth through joyful things. But I know that the times when I have grown the most have been when I have been broken...when I have been in need of something far greater than myself or anyone else on this earth could offer me. In those moments, when I cry out to God, when my dependence is on Him alone, I always learn something about God and myself. Maybe it is about God's grace and my selfishness, or maybe His forgiveness and my stubbornness. Whatever it may be is a gift...a gift born out of the unconditional love of God for ME.

No one has ever or will ever love me like God does. I don't have to worry about measuring up...I don't have to wonder if the choices I make about how I live or parent are going to embarrass or disappoint Him...and I don't ever have to earn His love...it's just always there in a unending stream.

So in the moments where I do have quiet I need to not fill it. Filling it might make me feel better for the moment but I know that what I need is a face to face encounter with the God of the universe who made me, knows me inside and out, and loves me with a passion unmatched. I hope for quiet today for me and for you.

Lucy and Big Ben

Lucy, my 4 and a half year old, is IN LOVE with Ben Roethlisberger, the QB for the Pittsburgh Steelers! She has loved Steelers football since she was a baby and she has loved Big Ben since the first time she saw him play. She has a #7 jersey that she would wear non-stop if I would let her and she calls Ben her boyfriend. Ben is just over 20 years older than Lucy, think he would wait for her? She wants to invite him to her birthday party and send him a valentine. It is a really sweet little crush she has. When she wakes up after there has been a nighttime Steelers game she always asks how Ben did and if they lost she wants to know if he felt sad.

Last year when the Steelers made their incredible run to win the Super Bowl we took the kids to both the Pep Rally before the big show and the Victory Parade a few days later. For the parade we were in downtown Pittsburgh with 250,000 of the Steelers faithful thanking our team for the amazing season they had topped off with a world championship. It was amazing...people of all races, creeds, ethnicities, political parties, sexual orientations and on and on gathered with a common goal...celebrating a football team and the Lombardi trophy. It may sound silly to some but I felt such a sense of community with everyone there. It was a powerful things to be united with that many people all pursuing the same goal. Nothing was going to stop us from doing what we came to do.

I have gone back to that feeling so many times when I think about the state of the Christian church in America. We are so splintered and broken. Rather than allowing our commonalities to bring us together we choose to let our differences separate us. It is really sad because we are so much weaker when divided. I know that some will disagree with me...and I'm okay with that. I'm not talking about watering down the message of Jesus or fundamentally changing the theology of the Church (universal)...please hear that. But I am talking about majoring in the major things rather than the minor ones. I'm tired of the conservative church throwing up issues as smokescreens so they don't have to get along with their less conservatives brothers and sisters. I'm tired of the liberal church doing things for shock value to avoid getting along with their less liberal Christian family.

In families we have to have the hard conversations and in the family of God we are often afraid to have those hard discussions. So we agree to disagree and try to move forward, but really we are stuck in the same place where people have been stuck for generations. We don't really like one another and the lip service we give to "loving all God's people" is a load of crap.

While at the Victory Parade I wondered what it would be like to be with a quarter of a million people all cheering for Jesus, thanking Jesus for what he has done, and feeling unified by our love for God. I wondered what it would be like if we could all take down our defenses and set aside our differences and remember that Jesus loves us ALL and He died and rose again for us ALL. If we could, even for a moment, lay aside all of our differences and focus on worshipping God and serving him together it is hard to imagine all we could accomplish.